this DNA test is the one tt is placed on evelyn and keith's bloggg.. i took it and it was rather true.. here ar the 1st 3 pointers i had abt myself..

You have a vivid capacity for imagery that allows you to see beyond your present circumstances

You like to be sure of yourself before voicing your opinion

A lot of your time is spent at home, or with the people you care about.

its true tt i always see beyond things.. i rem there's several times i hav been scolded.. or there ar times ppl get frustrated abt me.. but when i look into their eyes and look at the way they express their tots 2wards me i can see they were either heavily pressured or they had somethin else in their minds besides reprimandin me.. alot of time they weren't genuinely scoldings.. they jus scolded becoz they had some other reason.. so sometimes i jus smiled on the inside becoz i noe wat they wan 2 tok abt.. they jus merely covered up some facts and tried 2 make an impact on my behavior so tt i wouldn't repeat the same thing again..

the reason i need 2 b sure its becoz i cannot b reckless.. its becoz in the past im always careless abt things and thinkin onli the big pic.. whereas its always the little details tt ensures things ar done in the right way.. by ensurin myself b4 i voice out gives the ppl confidence and trust in my ideas..

though most of the time im a friendly person its always my desire 2 stay at home and tink abt wat i am doin.. nowadays im even more cautious by reviewin the things tt i hav done.. but there ar still things i still overlook.. most of them boils down 2 the confidence.. stayin at home also gives me time 2 plan out the things i need 2 do in the future and also time 2 tink on how 2 improve on matters..




i nv felt so dull 2dae.. on any other sat.. this could b perhaps the lowest dae of my life since i joined the cg..

hav we sort of compromise wif standards?? i tried 2 enter into the presence of God.. i need the ministerin from God.. but it seems tt i could not get in somehow or rather.. praise and worship 2dae was super fast.. everythin was chope chope.. i need 2 b fed wif my spiritual needs whenever it comes 2 cg esp when im always out in the field and servin the nation wif the best i noe how.. and when i tried 2 focus on God.. there'll b things tt go severely wrong.. (im not talkin abt my everydae devotions.. it's abt the praise and worship at cg!!)

hiccups can happen durin cg as to human is err.. but tink of it.. if every wk also like tt.. we ar jus like singin songs and b happi.. we ar not worshippin God!!

nvm.. i tot.. somehow the presence of God is subjective.. as long as i flow wif them i should b alrite.. at least im not deviatin anywhere but followin the cg..

after cg i look ard.. though there were mani ppl but i felt someone's missin.. well thank God michael's ard.. but there's no mikko melvin kelvin or wilson.. all these ppl ar like the best pals in the cg.. and 2dae none was ard.. and in the end im like a zombie walkin ard durin fellowship..

but there's still michael.. i thank God 4 him man.. nowadays he's able 2 converse and communicate more wif the cg.. it's realli encouragin tt he had changed quite abit since dae 1 he came w/o realli hangin ard wif the guys and talkin much..

then we had our dinner in a food court at cuppage road.. it was a wrong decision 2 go there becoz even my cookhouse food is better than those tt were here.. michael agreed. period.

i jus wish tt i'll quickly retire the dae as i dun wish tt this sat ever happen again in my life.. jus as we were abt 2 get home.. we heard a blind man shoutin, "anyone goin 2 sengkang?? can help me guide 2 the MRT??" no one seemed 2 help him an i took the step 4ward and helped him walk towards the north east line station at dhoby ghaut.. soon after i helped him all the way to the lift at sengkang MRT and he walked off from there..

at least the dae's meaningful after all.. it felt gdd helpin this blind man.. i hav nv see him b4 ard in sengkang.. perhaps is an angel in disguise?? man i'll b real blessed if it is so..




i believe tt i got a dream from God this afternoon..

it was abt 4pm when i took a short nap.. suddenly i dreamt abt runnin along the northwestern parts of sentosa 2 the sothwestern part of sentosa.. i started off sprintin and leapin away and i overtook so mani ppl and grps who were runnin 2gether as a team.. and i felt realli great and b4 i knew it i was already runnin alone leavin the guys so far behind..

then i felt fatigue came and overtake me.. i felt so exhausted i hav absolutely no strength 2 sprint anymore.. my legs could onli stride 4ward the best i noe how.. then suddenly a competitor came and he was pacin me.. i dunwan 2 giv up and i continue stridin my best..

but my body could not take it much further.. i gave a shout and suddenly i felt tt im able 2 sprint again.. wif tt i took off wif my legs and ran ahead of my competitor and off i go.. and i woke up..

i looked at the time.. its 6.12pm.. i quickly change up and go 4 dinner.. as i walked along the way i tot 2 myself.. how i wish i had the ability 2 run like i did in my dream!! the feelin of breezin past ppl and the ability 2 run tt fast is realli great.. jus by the way i stride and open my legs is already gd enuff.. let alone sprintin past all my competitors..

but my confidence is shaken soon after.. i noe reality bites.. there's no way i could complete such a race wif such incredible abilities..

but God spoke 2 me, "u hav wat it takes 2 b the best.. go 4 it.. im wif u.." when will this ultimate challenge come?? this calls 4 preparation.. and it all starts wif the mind 1st..




the things in this world can't last 4eva.. the attempt 2 make it permanent its a rebellion unto the LORD.. eternity onli takes place in heaven.. and not onto this world..

last week was realli great.. despite the fact tt the camp is far.. i had much quality time spendin wif myself and my family.. i had lots of freedom too.. but i noe tt this pleasure cant last coz im not goin 2 take my prof test 4eva.. i tried 2 convince myself tt stayin out isnt gdd.. but in the end i cant deny tt the freedom i had is like a taste from heaven..

and once again i find myself balancin out my emotions again.. between the fact tt i hav 2 stay in and train in the jungle once again vs. the pleasures i had last week.. call it stay in blues if u wan.. shall i resigned 2 fate and admit tt tt's the life 4 me 4 the rest of the 8 mths?? prob not.. coz if i do i'll develop a negative attitude 2wards my superiors and is not verii gdd on me.. then there's nigel.. who had the opportunity 2 stay out as he is now bein posted 2 his new unit.. (but then his work had realli high levels of responsibilities and furthermore he's a 2SG.. a regular..)

i couldn't agree more wif pastor tt our fruits is our backup 2wards our faith in God.. yes there ar times when i feel down becoz i do not hav the freedom i wanted.. but God has changed me into somethin tougher and bigger in the inside.. nowadays i hav the capacity 2 handle impt and critical decisions and 2 organize things well.. all thanks 2 the trainin i had despite the tough lessons i get..

so wat when everyone ard me seemed 2 b enjoyin themselves and havin a gd time while i seemed 2 b sufferin?? i've gotta b positive.. there's a greater height 2 soar.. there's a bigger goal 2 achieve..




i hav seen this in many lives of the street kids.. they always cling onto somethin 4 verii long and refuse 2 change.. no matter how somebody try 2 persuade them 2 change they would not change 4 the gdd.. and as such they grew up developin a mindset justifyin their actions were rite and therefore they always cheat themselves wif wat seems rite and gddd in front of their eyes..

i always tot by talkin and behavin in a manner like them i could understand them better and they could hopefully follow me and my zeal 4 God.. but instead i found myself confused and frustrated most of the time coz the progress aint goin anywhere.. i realized tt though i had their manners and their culture and their outer appearance and expressions.. i miss out 1 thing tt they will follow me: their minds..

these street kids hav been deeply rooted in their psychological behaviors and need more than jus words 2 change.. firstly they need 2 b understood completely.. and they need the rite ppl 2 always b wif them.. slowly but surely they will change 4 the better when everydae we show tt we care 4 them.. time and patience is much needed as these kids ar movin in baby steps..

i realized tt unlike them.. my mind is quick 2 adopt 2 change.. tt's y im rather diff from them despite my expressions and outer personalities which resembles them.. it's a slow but sure thing.. i mus admit tt we ar not God.. we cant change them all at once..

we make a difference workin hard.. but then again if im not caught up wif my army life i would surely do somethin abt it..




when i was young i hav this drug allergy named G6PD.. however when i declared it at CMPB they did a blood test 4 me and found the results negative.. meanin tt im actualli free from G6PD.. some time last yr after i became a full fledge medic i went 2 check my medical records and found tt they still mentioned abt my G6PD status coz i proved 2 them abt it wif my birth records..

it was recently tt i found out tt even though they made mention of my G6PD status they placed a side note beside it.. which says, "G6PD present.. ignore warning msg.." this meant they actualli took heed of the test and gave the green light from my drug allergies.. (now this is realli funni.. im supposed 2 hav a 'medik awas' taggg which says abt my G6PD status.. aniwae who would wan 2 hav a 'medik awas' tagg wif them when it costs $$$ 2 apply one and the procedures were troublesome??) so tt means from now on i couldn't "smoke" my doctors (esp my MO) abt my G6PD status..

but it realli reminds me how God healed me of this drug allergy tt i had..

this G6PD status is FOR LIFE.. it is a type of blood deficiency which is found within the red blood cells.. it means tt the red blood cells lack of a certain enzyme called G6PD and therefore i hav 2 abstain from vitamin K foods and supplements which include things like flavabeans.. vermicelli and chi medicine.. grandma told me tt when i was young i was fed wif chi medicine 4 the 1st time i got severe allergic reaction 4 it and had 2 b rushed 2 the hospital..

however durin my checkup.. they did the finger prick test and found the results negative.. they further drew a bagg of blood (which sent me vommittin) for further investigations but they still found the enzymes there.. the doctors couldn't realli explain y.. but i knew wat happen coz i noe my God has healed me of my deficiency so tt i could b in gdd health and serve Him!! Praise the Lord!!

there ar mani of u out there who hadn't exp the power of God workin in ur life b4.. hav faith in God.. ur miracle will come..




it was realli fun on wed when we go out 2 the seas on a boat 4 some trainin.. as usual im their gdd old cover medic 4 my coy as they were practicing their coastal hook drills..

b4 tt we learnt some capsize drill.. OC wans me 2 go down 2 the water jus like the others.. well its jus onli the water.. i tot.. after tt i'll b dry.. so i jus jump in and out.. simple.. later on we went along the waters and i saw punggol marina.. i nv been 2 this place though.. but my friendzz told me tt the place is gdd 4 the water sports.. then i saw yachts and those party boats anchorin by the dock.. reminds me of the show "the golden path" tt how the actress jin feng died.. hahaha.. kinda amusin.. but its rainin and it kinda spoils the little sightseein we had..

i was sittin on a field chair inside a boat.. wif my 2 hands folded i delt so stable.. even the waves and the boat kept swirlin ard the waters i jus sat there unmoved.. it felt so great.. its like even when things goes shaky im still assured tt i am safe and there's nothin tt's goin 2 take me down..

its a pity tt some of the men took this chance 2 catch some slp.. and wif tt the CSM's not happi.. soon after the men started practisin their coastal hook drills.. their deployment was simply awesome.. my superiors told me b4 tt when a drill is perfectly xecuted u will see the toughness of the men and u will feel proud of them.. the proud feelin was there at tt verii moment.. im absolutely proud of wat the lads could do..

the nite comes and this time we head further to punggol end.. watchin the tankers and big ships lightin up is simply awesome.. i sat on the field chair again and in awe of the sea and the ships.. after which we went 2 do the drill 4 one last time b4 we head back 2 our gddd old camp..

it was a realli gdd exp out at sea.. though i love it i deny tt i prefer stickin wif our navy.. this exp is gdd but im afraid if we do it all the time it might not b favorable as i tot it would b..




well i took off 2dae.. reason is becoz if i dun.. i'll b like a zombie physically and i'll break down mentally.. wif all the water trainings and prog tt were lined up this week i'll prob cry at the end of the wk when i book out or i'll b at the SAF ward in midweek.. lolzz.. but most imptly is the rest tt i need.. after all when i book out on sun mornin i onli had 2 hrs of slp.. then it was service.. and then fellowship.. if im to book in on sun nite i'll nv get enuff rest..

i tink 1 of the goals tt were in my mind constantly for the past yrs is a strong pool of ppl fellowshippin.. i tink since 2004-2006 i had been hopin tt the cg stays united and im always tryin 2 do so at my verii best i noe how.. but most of the time i see verii little ppl comin 2gether and its always the same few ppl who came.. i tink at tt time i gave up becoz of the failures of rakin up a big grp 2 fellowship.. it seems tt the prog doesn't seemed attractive.. or rather it was not at a rite time when everyone was busy.. and even though it is such as the public hols there were ppl could not make it still..

its realli amazin yesterdae tt abt 15 ppl came 2gether 4 post lunch-fellowship at the minds cafe.. ppl like tiffany.. aaron and keng mok were there 2 join us.. euquin also came wif us surprisingly and there was michelle too.. now the prob is.. can we keep this??

jus like was ps kong preached yesterdae.. those who wan 2 leave will eventually leave.. there ar ppl for the past yr who left after comin 4 quite some time but there ar quite a handful tt stayed.. and wat we should do is 2 continue 2 lead ppl 2 Christ and share the love of God.. the rest is up 2 God and the ppl's decisions.. and this success mentioned above is onli interim and it doesn't pay 2 b content and satisfied wif wat we had yesterdae..

well im quite optimistic abt our fellowship abt our cg.. ultimately it is God who gave the increase in depth and width.. we had a gdd spiritual morale.. we can keep this up!!




i always get this queer feelin when im bookin out..

thank God i did not book out last nite.. the tot of spendin my transport fees on goin back home.. lazin by the com 4 a few hrs.. and comin back 2 camp didnt seemed gd.. and furthermore there's nite trainin 2 help me keep fit.. so im actualli rather satisfied wif how i spent the nite..

this queer feelin is like a rush of sadness from within.. i dunwan 2 let my hair down coz this period is the time tt i train up 4 my brunei trip.. but at the same time there's the soft voice from within tt speaks 2 u otherwise in times of idleness.. therefore i shut it up by keepin myself busy.. i noe tt once im involved in trainin.. in the med ctr areas i should b fine.. coz i made my mind 2 b productive in my cap this yr.. no more shall my needs and concerns come 1st.. but the impt matters tt need 2 b dealt shall b the tasks tt ar necessary 2 b completed..

im already well prepared 2 stay in 4 a long period of time.. of coz there mus b food.. loads of food 2 help me pass thru the nite.. then there's my mp3.. and my lifelong partner 4 now: the psp.. to keep me company.. hahahah..

oh well as 4 the reason im out 2dae is becoz i got my SAF ward duty later on.. i need 2 come back home and grab some of my stuffs b4 goin there.. since im comin out might as well come out earlier some time b4 my duty starts.. lolzz.. its also a gd time 2 let me catch a breather b4 proceedin 2 finish the week tt's ahead..




i feel so wretched when im face the computer dunno wat 2 bloggg when everythin's well and i wanted 2 tell the world somethin and yet i could write up somethin gdd.. wat the heck is realli happenin 2 me?? perhaps im procastinatin 2 blogg!! and urghhhh.. i hav a cranky feelin ard me..

so the new yr has arrvied.. the last 2 daes i jus spend my time at home lazing ard and gettin prepared mentally 4 the comin new yr.. i tot 2 myself.. finish the NS race which had onli 8 mths left.. brunei aint tt badd.. im goin 2 get fitter.. im gonna grow tougher.. and all the positive tots jus flew rite to my mind.. im not gonna complain abt wat im doin..

and the past few daes i wanted 2 get my bball game back.. but the bball court's under renovation.. i wanted 2 train there so much but since its under renovation i hav 2 play in another ocurt.. but tt court is so near 2 the road and it feels kinda weird when its not surrounded by HDB blocks and any person who jus walked by the road could see me.. i decided not 2 go into deeper trainin..

this new yr im gonna commit into my stay-in life.. the CSM's plannin some nite PT so i guess it'll b rather beneficial.. but i hope he does it often so tt i could b a stronger person.. and if he doesn't i could perhaps train on my own.. but perhaps not a verii fulfillin trainin aniwae..

it seems like there's a new spirit and a new anointin within me this yr.. there's got 2 b the capacity.. the new wineskin within me.. but its onli the 1st dae of the yr.. there ar 365 more daes to go.. (note: this yr is a 366 dae yr.. lolzz..) and the 1st step shall start tomolo.. make or break?? its all in my hands..

wEiwEi
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