im so tired rite now.. i was thinkin too much..

i rem daryl once told me tt sis est went 2 the bible sch and when ps mike connell was preachin, he suddenly sae, "i can sense tt in this room some of u conspired 2 kill me.." the bible sch students were shocked.. how could this be?? the bible sch students need 2 b spiritually filled 2 b qualified as a student.. but when pastor sae tt it seems unbelievable..

but it's not surprising.. becoz the bible sch students ar still of flesh and blood.. they sometime may harbor bitterness and hatred.. however the bible sch students did not hav the slightest intention 2 do so but the seed may grow 2 become a desire and it may cause unrest.. therefore deliverance needs 2 b taken place in such times..

as i was a train on the way home.. i was thinkin tt y am i so bias against ceratin ppl?? those ppl tot tt i hav attitude prob.. but to the others im an angel and a gd friend and an encourager.. how come to these ppl tt i will pose a harsh and rough manner 2 them?? i reflected on myself and indeed there was a little bitterness and bias attitudes.. i can love all my other friendz.. but 2 these certain grp of ppl i jus cant show my love.. i dunno y im holdin back myself so harshly.. wat shall i do??

hatred can indeed kill, steal and destroy.. im jus thankful tt i did not water this evil seed.. i realli do not wan 2 go back 2 my old ways where i hate ppl and relationships ar totally smashed and broken..




i supposed 2 wake up and 7am 2 pray.. but instead i slept back and i dream of somethin..

i dreamt tt i had a baby and he was like 1-2 yrs old.. he's a verii active baby and likes 2 crawl alot.. mani a times he jus crawl and strayed ard jus like tt.. i dunno how 2 cure his hyperactiveness but i jus watch him crawl and make sure tt he does not meet any danger..

tt nite i brought the baby out and it was rainin heavily.. suddenly the baby was crawlin ard again.. then i saw dad picked him up and whack him on the backside and make him still in 1 corner.. so finally the baby setlled down.. and when i turned ard.. i saw the baby crawling again.. this time into a big drain hole.. and i saw him fell into the big drain hole on a rainy nite..

i was shocked till i was like, "wat happened.." at tt pt i didnt noe wat 2 do.. i jus stood there in my shocking state.. dad then quickly call the ambulance and mum rushed down the drain and saved him up on a rainy day.. then after 4 quite a while mum came out of the drain wif muddy stains all over his body and i saw the baby in a bloody mess.. i looked on as my mum quickly carried the baby 2 the ambulance tt had arrived and they went 2 the hospital.. then dad sae, "he may die.. he may not live long.. there was blood all over his head.." immediately i cried and cried and cried 4 my baby.. then dad comforted me and sae, "dun b too sad.. u could hav another baby.."

the nxt thing i knew is i woke up and heard mum shouted from the kitchen, "hey!! dun 4get 2 eat ur bread which i left on the table!!" realizing tt it was a dream and also tt im goijn 2 b late.. i make haste 2 prepare myself 2 sch.. and rite now it hurts me 2 see tt baby die.. i saw tt blood.. i rem the face.. i griefed at the events.. it realli hurts me alot.. could it b an oracle of the future?? or could it b a curse by the devil?? no matter wat.. i pray tt all things will eventually b well under the hands of God..

i finally knew the pains of the departure of ur loved ones.. always b there 2 treasure them..




its probably the worst start of the mornin..

i was greeted by a scoldin phonecall from angie 4 not remindin her 2 go 4 lect 2dae.. but tt was still ok as i tot, "well i dunno.. jus 4get it lahz.."so i went on 2 do my stuffs.. then after tt i went NBA.com and went 2 check the results of game 2 eastern conference finals.. the game stood at halftime but the match preview wrote: will miami end up the same fate as phoenix?? now this is real ridiculous!! in miami u got shaquille o neal.. probably the best player currently in the NBA.. and u cant compare tt steve nash, who is onli a 1-time season mvp..

this is stupid.. i tot.. so i went 2 play NBA shootout on my playstation.. and currently im playin the western conference final where LA lakers take on minnesota.. (of coz.. i hav a start-studded lineup of shaquille o neal, tim duncan, dirk nowitzki, kobe bryant and jason kidd.. muahahaha..) but i jus couldn't limit the shots of the opposition team.. so in the end they shot over 50%.. and they scored alot too.. so i kept on reseting the game becoz i dunwan them 2 score so much.. but still they keep on scoring after i reset a few times.. in the end i was so frustrated tt i off my playstation..

and i jus sat by the computer table.. i did not wan 2 do anithin.. dunwan 2 eat.. dun feel like listenin 2 music even though it's playin.. dunwan 2 play any other games anymore.. so in the end i'll jus listen abit of techno 2 appease myself.. then after tt i start usin the com again..

the day still long ahead.. i better pray tt nothin else much will happen..




and it shall come 2 pass tt tomolo 2pm i will b in the lecture hall liaoz.. old faces i will meet.. and new faces i shall see.. i believe tt it will b a verii diff sem becoz i noe wat's realli changin within me.. and how shall i present myself 2 myself this comin sem..

peter asked me if i had enuff of the holidaes.. i sae no.. the holidaes were like, i dunno.. i seemed 2 b doin somethin everytime and almost everydae.. but thank God it was thru all these things tt i did not become a lazy person and unprepared 4 the comin sem.. and somehow it also reflects of my future work life.. there would b no holidaes watsoever except onli for 14 daes a yr.. the tasks durin the holidaes made me giv up the comfort i had and stepped into the realm of maturity 2 get myself ready 4 the future..

had a great dae out wif the guys of the cg.. it seems tt without the gals we ar not limited 2 the things we do nor ar we pulled ard by the gals 2 go on a shoppin spree.. the others watched star wars in the mornin and i joined them 4 lunch later on.. after tt we went 2 play pool and then willy wanted 2 visit plaza sing.. soon it was already 5 and we went on our separate ways from there..

my resolution 4 this sem?? no Cs and Ds, i pray.. neither i wan failures in any subjects.. also i knew tt it would b an exciting sem.. coz there ar more work.. more stress.. more projects.. tutorials.. and attachment is comin up in a few mths time.. wif a whole load of stuffs 2 do.. i believe things ar goin 2 b fruitful..




i rem 1 of my christian friendz came 2 me and told me her vision 4 the comin sem.. i was rather impress and challenge her 2 go 4 it.. and 2dae's msg in service further blew my mind 4 the vision this comin sem..

yes i noe i hav POS the few weeks.. but i dun should totally devote 2 it.. i always tot tt the act of holiness is always stayin wif the true fellowship of the disciples of Jesus Christ.. but i realized we would b heroes if we can impact lives in our campuses.. i believe everyone, esp christians, ar the heroes of their campuses?? y?? they ar supposed 2 bring hope, love and faith into their project grp mates... classmates etc lives..

i admit 4 the past few sems i've realli been harsh on my friendz.. sometimes i jus get into argues.. but i thank God 4 the grace tt they dun hate me.. but this sem im not goin 2 do the same.. the fruit of a christian is being patient and gentle.. i will strive 2 bear this fruit tt i may inherit and greater blessin and aniontin from the LORD..

so my fellow tp friendz.. i pray tt u ar all blessed.. 4 those who ar in the same yr as me mus realli jia you and chiong... this is our final yr and we should b realli serious abt our work.. but on the other hand do not despair and b so stressed up by ur work.. need encouragement do drop by and visit me.. haha.. aniwae jus all the best eh in this new sem??

may the blessings b wif u.. i pray..




a great time i had wif the Holy Spirit 2dae..

2dae ministry was realli relaxin.. instead teachin of the pri 4 kids 2dae im teachin p5.. and ee tiong gave me the authority 2 jus take over the class.. so i started slow.. explainin of wat ar we goin 2 learn 2dae.. and after tt i gave them an activity 2 do.. the activity was 2 write a short compo based on wat they hav learned.. so when they submitted their ans.. i was so shocked by what they wrote.. but aniwae i refuse 2 comment and i jus thank God tt they hav learned somethin.. so the lesson continued wif some practising of worksheets and then a quiz.. and wif tt tuition ended..

but wat's realli enjoyable is 2dae cg..

when everyone gathered 2 start the cg there were onli abt 20 ppl.. much lesser than the normal average.. and wif evelyn and angie.. sis esther 2 most trustworthy right hand women did not appear of cg 2dae.. sis esther turned 2 me and sae, "ehh.. sit nearer mahz.. there is aniontin here u noe.." so i jus moved towards her BY FAITH.. and when i was beside her immediately i knew wat i had 2 do.. stir up the atmosphere of the cg.. and so i began 2 praise and worship God as much as i can.. so tt the cg will b lighten up despite our impt members ar missin.. b4 the cg while i was printin the song sheets i typed a line of prayer and encouragement at the bottom.. and it came 2 pass.. tt the presence of God fell into the cg and we jus kept on worshippin and worshippin God..

there was no lack of strength and energy from the start 2 the end of the cg.. at the same time the word of the LORD fell on me and i jus feel like prophesyin tt the love of God would flow out and touchin all the lives of the cg members.. and the Holy Spirit within me jus cried out of love He had 4 the cg.. the nxt thing i knew was tt sis esther went 2 pray 4 those who responded tt they wan a touch from God.. after cg ends.. i could feel tt everyone is recharge 2 live another dae..

the manifestation of the spirit did not stop here.. joy was all ard the cg 2dae.. despite without the presence of certain members i stir up the atmosphere and made it real lively within the cg.. after when we had dinner we had a great time of fun and laughter at takashimaya..

i pray tt this anionting would not go away.. let me use this aniontin 2 bring joy and laughter 2 the cg and church tomolo!!




ok 2dae is the release of the talentime results... congrats on those who entered into the semi finals and blessed ar those who did not qualify.. 4 they already did their best..

thank God POS trainin isn't tt long 2dae.. i managed 2 came home and hav abundant relaxation as i took this time 2 listen willy delirious CD i hav borrowed from him quite a few daes ago.. see.. me so busyz until now then got time listen CD... lolzz.. wonder how im goin 2 manage my time when sch starts.. i jus pray tt when sch starts my life will resume the schoolin lifestyles few mths ago.. lolzz.. the past few sems i always had trouble adjustin back lifestyles.. pray tt i do not struggle anymore..

i cant believe it tt the word power challenge is near the corner as it is onli nxt tues.. i onli memorize 10 verses.. and there's supposed 2 b 40 verses.. and if u test me rite now i could onli jus rem 1 verse.. and i may also recite wrongly.. and this yr i jus wan the experience.. i realli do not wan 2 win becoz i hav no time 2 participate in the semi finals..

4 some of my non CHC readers in my blog.. u probably wonder wat is POS and y i keep on mentionin.. and wat is word power challenge?? well POS is a cheerleadin competition and so is the word power challenge.. these competitions were organized by our church 4 the upcomin youth conference in june.. as i browse thru our church official web jus now.. i saw so mani upcomin events in the near time.. i jus wonder.. how am i goin 2 balance studies and attendin all these stuffs??

i'll find a way aniwae.. all things ar possible wif God..




the past few nites i've been reachin home late.. its such a tiring job 2 reach home late..

sometimes i need 2 feel human.. after all it isn't realli gd 2 stay home late.. i tot i'd rush 2 trainin after work but firstli it rained so heavily and secondly i realli need 2 rest.. tt's y i sae i need 2 feel human.. i need 2 rest..

ok mayb im too "jonah".. keep on runnin away.. lolzz... but aniwae i'll jus imitate him.. aniwae it's not like im not returnin.. i will come back of where i left off..

ok now wat im gonna do? besides bloggin and bloggin and blog some more and blog even more.. i tot i would like 2 rest 1 more dae.. aniwae sch startin soon.. if dun rest now later when sch starts i onli hav little or no time 2 rest from all the stuff i had.. aniwae when the timetable came out 2dae i feel so disgusted.. tues is my POS in 2 wks time and lessons end at 6pm.. my God.. im gonna rush down by cab most probably.. and furthermore it's a tutorial.. im gonna hav a tough time liaoz..

i jus pray all would go well on POS.. the race of faith on the POS mus b wif completion.. if i trained all tt long and wif all the efforts i had.. i'll b the world's no 1 idiot if i sae, "i cannot go.." i'll jus pray tt i would b able 2 make it via cab.. hope tt i could enter at least into the audi and get on stage!! tt's all i wan.. not 2 demandin isn't it??

the sight of the timetable still scares me.. the shock truth of our class is splitted devastates me.. but i knew tt all things ar under the control of God's hands.. surely He had somethin in His mind 4 me..




as the POS trainin is gettin more and more intensed.. trainin schedules were also increasin and more stressful...

2dae's trainin is 12 noon at church.. tomolo's also the same.. i can understand tt the top ppl were gettin rather stressed up wif all the stuffs they had.. indeed wantin 2 b the 1st is not easi.. and along the way u jus feel tt u wan 2 jus back out and let the other do the job.. but on the other hand u wan the glory of the success in TRP.. so in the end?? hang till everythin's over..

and so all my time is occupied by POS trainin.. this is the last week of the holidaes.. i tot i could had some fun and also plan out my stuffs.. oh well.. plans ar held back 4 the moment.. and mayb 4 long..

sch is startin soon.. already haven start sch i already feel so stress... wat is this man?? my 3rd yr is comin... attachments ar comin.. final yr project is comin too... i feel tt all these things aint worryin my mind now as the only thing i tink abt is, "dance steps.. cheer.. POS.. win!!" lolzz..

seems tt i realli make a wrong decision not 2 go on a holidae or 2 help my dad's biz in ipoh.. but on the other hand i tink im steppin out of my comfort zone already and prayin 4 faith and the God's strength..

alrite so holidaes ar comin 2 an end.. wat has weiwei done?? alot.. as i browse thru my past archives and realized tt my holidaes were totally stressed up.. the earlier part was due 2 poor time mgt.. the later part was due to pack time schedules.. haha.. wat abt a short holidae the nxt time round?




POS costume costs 30 dollars.. i asked from my mum from it and it ended up in a quarrel..

she found out tt it was of the church and started all the rounds again.. tt time there was no mp3 wif me except my computer game sounds which didnt realli keep my ears occupied.. of coz angers enters and everythin when chaotic between me and her.. should hav realli wear my headphones and blast as loud as my ears could take it..

but if u ar one of my bros and sis.. do not tok 2 me abt this matter too..

it realli takes more than a mountain 2 climb 2 reach out 2 my parents.. and dunno when they would make the decision.. jus hope tt b4 Jesus Christ comes back..

and well.. i noe wat 2 do lahz.. let me appease my anger can? thank God alan is wise when he saw me expressed my unhappiness towards my mum some time ago.. or else i would hav flare out like crazy back then.. sometimes i would prefer 2 not do anithin or tok 2 anyone when somethin i noe i did wrong or somethin i noe i screwed up... mayb this is the "time span of repentance.."

well at the end of this.. if u would help.. do pray tt i would not flare my tempers up easily.. i dun care wat it takes.. i wan 2 b trained not 2 anyhow b angry over things..




after 2 nites of conference wif pastor phil pringle.. it seems tt it gave me a gd kick 2 live on wif life.. though his msg on loyalty received a standin ovation in church.. i feel tt the 2nd nite msg on the D-days was more impactin 2 me..

it is rather true tt we had mani mani times things jus fail and disappointed us.. but at times things could onli get worse.. i rem all the failures i made when i was born again and i always tot they wouldn't b a gd thing 2 tok abt it when i progress.. but somehow it is a process tt God would brings us 2 in a better life.. these things could b well testified 2 the nxt generation of christians when im advanced in age and it could b a great foundation of wat i hav acheived...

but wat's great last nite is the vision from God when i worshipped.. i feel tt my body is splitted up by the angels of war and the angels jus leaped into the dark side of me.. breakin every sin and shame.. they shouted, "the blood of Jesus is upon u!!" and there was a great massacare of devils within me and within a few moments my body is like a desolated battlefield... wif all the devils fell by the sword of the angels.. suddenly my mind is renewed... im beginnin 2 love again.. dreams and visions came back again.. im livin 2 the max once again..

and 2dae i had a great time restin.. played bball and then went out wif alan.. i jus hope tt things would realli b better jus as God promised... amen




im supposed 2 go 4 ps phil pringle conference 2dae.. but becoz im held back by my mother's dae dinner and i ended up spendin the nite at a vegetarian restaurant..

it's realli a dae of frustration.. i could not get things rite.. first u got a borin dinner earlier on.. secondly its rainin and i cannot go play bball.. thirdly u hav nothin 2 do at home.. but still i continue 2 write my book on my life wif God... but w/o the inspiration of the Holy Spirit i could not write a gd one..

and y 2dae's dinner is borin?? y 2 b honest.. everytime our family get 2gether 4 a dinner it's always borin.. coz at the dinner table.. the main topic would b appraisin the restaurant food they hav eaten.. they would either sae this is nice.. this is not nice.. blah blah blah.. 4 me i dun care so much.. all i noe is the food as long as it's edible and does not produce any uncanny smells or feelings it is acceptable to enter my mouthn 4 digestion..

either tt.. or the whole family would b so engrossed in eatin and nv tok at all.. and therefore the family dinner = family come 2gether eat. period. nobody toks abt each other.. and instead of food i could hav gained spirtual nourishment wif ps phil.. but my dad came home yesterdae and mother's dae hasn't been celebrated.. so bo bian.. i hav 2 honor my parents.. but how i wish im in church rite now!!

well thank God tomolo i'll b goin 4 the conference liaoz..




ok it's been a long time since i blogged.. i confess tt i hav been lazy.. and mus repent.. lolzz..

well recently is realli nothin 2 report.. life's like this.. rite now its the wonderin daes 4 me... cg members ar jus plain dull at times.. tp harvesters were jus ok at times.. my friendz were busyz wif their own stuffs all the time and in the end im always fellowshippin wif the Holy trinity.. veriii ke lian hor?

but when im alone.. i do tink of alot of things..

recently i jus dream of bein a business consultant and i further dream tt i hav a company of my own.. main job is 2 giv biz tips 2 companies on how can they excel and push their biz into a greater height.. but then some time later i tot of bein somethin more impactin becoz i feel tt i should do somethin real gd so tt i'll hav a gd report 2 the LORD when i go 2 heaven..

also when im alone.. i do tink of my future..

few yrs down the rd im sure 2 sign up 4 a degree course in NIE.. truly in my heart there ar some doubts.. but i'll jus leave the matter into God's hands.. He noes wat's best 4 me..

oh well.. i still hav some plans.. but i'll rather concentrate on the things tt i hav 2 face.. like POS trainin.. and word power's nxt wk..

Your #1 Match: INFP

The Idealist You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world. Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships. It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close. But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop. You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist.

Your #2 Match: INTP

The Thinker You are analytical and logical - and on a quest to learn everything you can. Smart and complex, you always love a new intellectual challenge. Your biggest pet peeve is people who slow you down with trivial chit chat. A quiet maverick, you tend to ignore rules and authority whenever you feel like it. You would make an excellent mathematician, programmer, or professor.

Your #3 Match: ENFP

The Inspirer You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends. You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules. Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives. You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller! You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.

Your #4 Match: ENTP

The Visionary You are charming, outgoing, friendly. You make a good first impression. You possess good negotiating skills and can convince anyone of anything. Happy to be the center of attention, you love to tell stories and show off. You're very clever, but not disciplined enough to do well in structured environments. You would make a great entrpreneur, marketing executive, or actor.

in my life i came across mani ppl who sae tt they failed.. and all the time ppl dun seem 2 understand them wat they hav been.. all they wan is ppl 2 praise them sayin, "woww... u ar such a great fella.. been thru so much and so tough.. u ar one of the toughest person livin on earth.."

in actual fact.. they do not noe tt the person sayin those words had actualli failed more times then them... but who had actualli understood each other unless they confessed wat had happen?

i rem back in those daes when i started playin bball.. my seniors saw my height but they knew tt i do not noe the game well and they "bullied" me by jus shootin over my head and jump shoot their balls over my head... it was a big time of great humility.. and i rem once tt there was a guy who was almost halfed my height played again and he jus made a fool out of me in the bball court..

but i knew at tt time my pride was not impt.. all im interested is 2 play the game well.. so every mornin i always train and train my bball skills.. slowly and steadily i made it 2 the bball team.. and then became the secretary of the bball team and was also one of the student coaches in the bball team..

2dae when i step into the bball court 2 play.. even sch team players as tall as me hav 2 tink twice b4 they shoot.. i nv fail 2 swat the ball away when the ball is within my reach.. also im well respected by the juniors in the present bball team coz i hav already legacy behind..

y am i tellin u all these? i jus wan 2 prove tt wif faith and preseverance nothin can b impossible, esp 2 the LORD.. mani of my friendz who ar christians nowadays backout when they tot tt things ar not workin 4 them well 4 they tot the LORD was not wif them.. actualli the LORD was givin them a trial 2 help them develop in their character.. to put it in a simple example, God 1st tested u in the easy mode and u successfully pass.. now God wans 2 test u in the hard mode so tt u can improve ur gamin skills.. u sae its too diff and back off.. u ar missin God's entire purpose in life...

remember.. God is not interested 2 see u win.. He is interested 2 see ur progress in the gamin skills coz He will provide the win 4 u when u hav the character tt God wans.. the onli thing u can do is train, train and train.. and its similar 2 runnin the race of faith tt would develop a character tt pleases God.. my friendz.. continue 2 believe in God.. though u may hav relationship problems.. family problems and personal problems.. God is always bigger than ur problems.. 4 He is onli interested 2 see ur ownself changed and not seein u winnin all the time..

my christian friendz.. make a commitment 2dae tt u would not back down and bow down 2 any trials and diff times tt u face.. 4 God promises tt there will always b light at the end of the tunnel!!




thanks 2 the LORD tt i hav been able 2 sleep well last nite.. i tink the reason is becoz i changed the matress 2 slp and im so slept thru out w/o wakin up in the midddle of the nite disturbed.. also wif the quiet time b4 goin 2 church.. it strengthens me as i could feel the spirit of God discernin on me..

alrite 2dae pastor kong=prophet kong.. coz he's basically not preachin but he's edifyin us.. so 2dae prophet kong talked abt havin a open heaven within our lives.. and he also preached abt solomon's wish of wisdom when God ask him wat he wans.. so rite at the seat i was thinkin,"wat do i wan went god ask me this qn ahz??" and i tot, "well.. jus the spirit of God in my life will do.. i feel rather satisfied by His presence.." and so i kept on meditatin, "LORD.. let the Holy Spirit fill me always.." but at the same time i also pay attention 2 the sermon lahz.. so after the sermon pastor lay hands on us and tt's the end of the service...

and after fellowship i went 2 jurong pt wif tommy.. wanted 2 get a belt 2 replace my belt wif a damaged buckler and also laces 2 replace my tattered laces of my miserable sneakers.. went 2 77th street but quite disappointed coz they did not hav laces and belts tt i wan.. wanted 2 go somehwere else but i noe im jus too tired to do so.. so i jus went home and rest..

i noe a new chapter of my spiritual walk starts after this weekend.. lookin forward 2 tomolo's children church conference.. im so eager 2 noe wat pastor eileen had 4 us children church workers~~!!

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