when i packed my bags jus now.. i nearly 4get 2 bring the most impt thing of all.. PASSPORT

thank God my dad reminded me.. or else i'll b stuck at the immigration pt!!

whew.. finally after 4 so long.. i managed 2 escape from singapore and take a vacation somewhere else.. and thank God cong was wif me goin 4 the vacation.. if i stay in singapore there'll b like no dae and no nite 4 the work tt is piled up.. and wif the gloomy schedule tt was lyin ahead.. i wasn't able 2 see any free time of relaxation till mid dec when hari raya haji comes..

and yes.. im goin 2 malaysia, KL.. the capital of our neighbourin country.. i tink i'll jus eat and eat and eat over there till im fat.. (will i??) but on the hand.. im kinda childish-ly excited abt the theme parks in berjaya times sq and sunway lagoon.. haha.. its been a long time since i played those games and rides.. tink is gonna b fun..

and i wish i could AWOL at malaysia.. but man those MP surely find me wan.. so i better go some other places instead.. but its damn pathetic.. AWOL at malaysi where its onli jus beside the country.. wan AWOL also mus go further places mahz.. or even bigger countries like australia.. china.. USA etc etc..

oh well.. i shall not tink of other things rite now.. i jus wan 2 hav a great holidae.. ohh boy im so excited.. whee!!!!!!




the last 2 daes were realli bumpy.. gd things and bad things whacked my life on these 2 daes.. and its kinda.. overwhelmin..

on sat i actualli went 2 church ALONE.. damn pathetic sia.. its the 1st time out of my entire christian life i sat ALONE wif other ppl in a service.. the tots of gettin spotted from my church friendz is like relatively high.. so i sat near the exit area and after service i left in a rush..

true enuff i met one.. but its joseph.. my BMT platoon mate.. man im realli proud of him.. initially he came from another church servin in his youth ministry.. but as he is in the army rite now he could not find time attendin church and as such i invited him 2 CHC.. after a while due 2 the intense trainin prog in the army he did not attend svc when i invited him.. but tt dae i saw him i was realli shocked.. he told me tt he is in a cg now and the cg uses his hse 4 meetings.. amazin!! we talk along the way at the MRT and i thank God tt he finally found a home in CHC.. he told me tt he's still tryin 2 integrate in the cg but i believe he can wif all my heart..

tt nite i booked in late and OC was disappointed wif my lateness.. 2 b honest.. i wasn't quite sure of the time 2 report back 2 camp and tt's y im late.. but on the other hand i rem sgt goh sae tt OC is a guy who demanded his commanders 2 take more initiative 2 do things and not hav a laid back attitude towards matters..

now 2 make things worse.. i received more bad news from my friendz.. after a lengthy conversation over the phone i knew tt i could not slp well again.. and it tallied 2 a total of 4 nites where i couldn't hav a gddd sleep 4 myself..

the nxt dae where i was out wif the coy.. i cried out 2 God.. so mani weekends burned.. so mani things happened.. and by lookin at our trainin schedule it had a gloomy outlook coz it involves on mani weekends.. i couldn't find my route 2 take.. it seems tt my options were covered by a dark cloud where im stuck in nowhere..

i rem the sermon.. if onli i can see it.. believe it.. confess it.. and i'll hav it.. i begin 2 stand in faith 4 the things tt's abt 2 come.. God gave me a vision on the situation i had outside.. tt dae is the dae i felt close 2 God again.. despite the trainin tt was ongoin ard me..

this mornin i woke up and felt a bit better in my mind.. i saw erika's blogg which says, "ur mercies ar new every mornin.." this is perhaps God's promise 2 us everydae.. reached home at 9am and went 2 slp after tt.. after sleepin for abt 5 hrs my body felt restored.. felt tt it was a morale boost 4 the challenges tt were ahead.. at least this time i had a strong mindset 2 fight once again..




ok my passion 2 blogg has once again exp a dip.. but here i am reportin again..

the last 2 wks i had realli no time 4 myself.. despite the fact tt i had offs and all tt stuff.. but still it seems tt time is so little and by the time i had completed wat i wan 2 do time is almost over 4 me in the civilian world.. (so tt means time is like so short outside of camp and time is like so longgg inside the camp..)

5 daes 4 nites of field camp last wk.. from diggin trench 2 treatin minor injuries.. thank God realli despite the bad weather tt was exp no one realli fell sick..

i realized tt throughout these 2 wks i hav been dealin wif unrepentant ppl.. or ppl wif a big time attitudes.. even though i managed 2 tell them off.. my patience could not differ the fact tt there ar some who had actualli genuine probs..

take 4 example.. i had actualli a friend who is attached 2 my company 4 trainin.. he woke me up in the middle of the nite and complain tt he had rashes.. i jus send him away by tellin him 2 use the antiseptic powder tt he had.. jus like the rest of the men.. after which i kinda regretted coz we had been friendz since sec sch.. the nxt mornin i covered up by givin him the lotion i had 2 apply..

then again last nite while im doin duty at the SAF ward i told off and scolded the guys 4 not sleepin at the appointed time.. there's this particular guy who had sucidal tots and yet i told him off jus like the rest.. thank God he tried 2 reason things out wif me and i agreed 2 let him stay up till he's tired and wanted 2 slp so long as he dun disturb the others.. soon as i read his case files i realized tt he had a tough time wif his superiors and his unit.. in the end i managed 2 gave him some advice and he jus slept w/o givin me any kinda trouble..

i was reminded tt moses lost his temper in front of the israelites and God did not bring him into the promised land despite the fact tt he is a servant of God.. i rem i told willy tt i do not wan 2 commit this error when i had impt tasks on hand from God.. it had somehow seeped into my mind tt i rarely shouted at the men despite their wrongdoings they commited.. and somehow i earned their praise 4 bein a "nice medic" and also their trust 4 the treatment i had 4 their injuries.. be it bigg or small..

i do not wan 2 lose this trust.. its my key 2 reach out 2 them effectively..




after the discontented duty at the med ctr.. i entered the church 2 book seats wif a "wat-would-hav-been" stare.. 2 make things worse xinhong went and took my usual seats.. then i went 2 take the other rows.. then 1 bro wanted 2 take it but i jus took some of the seats from him.. and i gave him tt "dun-mess-ard-wif-me" look and he kinda back off from it and took the remainin ones.. the last thing i wan 2 do here is 2 hooligalise my way 2 get the seats.. and i got a badd record already 4 bookin seats.. so i better keep my cool..

so the cool was kept.. and eventually i cooled down.. man im proud of the members too.. they all fall in on time.. but too baddd some of them gotta squeeze.. but they ar UP THERE ALREADY.. and xinhong still frantically arrangin the seats and sortin out wif the usher.. thank God 4 punctual members!!!

the msg was well preached i tot.. it kinda challenged my mind alot esp when the SAF hav syphoned out much of the intelligence wif all the nonsensical regimentation tt was choked up in our minds.. and wif the conversation i strucked wif the other medic on duty on sat.. it kinda agreed wif my tots of havin an unfixed mindset of dealin wif the issues ard my environment..

while i was strugglin wif all the probs tt were facin in the med ctr and some of other disciplinary issues.. i realized tt i mus look at a bigger pic.. probs will go away eventually.. its onli a matter of when and how.. if i kept thinkin abt the probs tt were currently on hand.. there would b no end of it coz there ar always probs queuin up waitin 2 enter my life.. therefore it would b wise.. 2 pursue somethin tt is bigger instead of jus livin by..

it was a gddd msg i tot.. jus like the old daes where pastor used 2 preach abt faith.. somethin of which is so familiar and so greattt like the colossus of the old rising up again..




clearing my game
i cant believe it.. i took 3 daes of my free time and yet i haven clear tt scenario on heroes 3.. despite the might of my army.. the map is too biggg and there is onli 1x powerful hero 2 go ard conquerin while the rest stay at the castle 2 defend in case of any surprise attacks by the enemy..

the cg bloggg
tok abt the cg bloggg.. tt which laid the foundation and the path of influence for the rest of the members 2 setup their own.. has been like officially close down since i dunno when sia.. this yr march...?? and i tot of reviving it after it had gone case for 6 mths.. but i need a 1x gddd wallpaper and some help from some kind members..

the rise of gals
i used 2 like a gal environment kinda cg coz i used 2 b in the biz diploma and as such is also a gal environment.. then some time later the cg had more guys.. and at tt time i tried 2 adjust 2 the male dominant environment in the cg.. then when im enlisted into the jap occupation there is the male environment and im happi wif the way the cg is becoz the males ar UP THERE as it's a familiar environment.. but nowadays more gals ar comin.. and man regimentation cant b freely practiced... lolzz.. it's always like this.. perhaps God is tellin me tt i'll prob b back 2 the female environment again when i ORD and further my studies..

gloomy outlook
i hav survived the 1st week at my coy line coz i hav onli been there officially for 2.5 daes.. the subsequent week could b nites where i do not go out of camp and wif the nite trainings tt were planned 4 the wk it almost seemed quite impossible 4 me 2 go for nites off.. perhaps stay-in depression would come back once again?? i do not noe.. the men had depression probs wif their vocation as rifleman and they were already not performin well like they should b.. the commanders?? they jus live from dae 2 dae.. but on the positive side.. i should do somethin 2 serve the men in watever ways i can.. this will perhaps encourage the men and at the same time.. not tink too much..

well gotta book in real soon already ahzz ehhh..




i tink besides the medics.. the ppl ard me realli dunno wat my lifestyle is..

my family thinks my job veriii relac.. as i every nite accompany my parents 4 dinner.. they kept on sayin tt i had a gddd life.. every nite can come out and hav dinner.. and they would nagg and naggg abt the gdd life tt i had.. and they will tok abt how my bro suffer alot in SISPEC and onli able 2 book out on the weekends.. and they will sae my NS life is like part time..

the cg tinks tt i had gddd life.. everydae can come home and online.. except nigel and miguel dun realli care coz they somewhat understand my lifestyle (do they????) then when they ask me abt my book in timin they ar quite surprised tt i can book in so late.. then alan always accuse me of bein slack in camp and i hit him back by sayin tt he has a similar vocation as me and i will tell him 2 speak 4 himself..

then the coy specs thinks tt i stay out all the time!! the storemen were in disbelief when i shifted in.. "medic.. y u shift in here?? i tot u stay out personnel??" asked the one of the storemen..

"no.. im not.. 4 ur info.. i stayed in at the HQ block up there at lvl 4.." i replied..

"ohh realli mehz?? i tot ur stayin in is a fake??"

this is a lie!! blasphemy!! slander!! i stayed out illegally at times but not always.. but the last time i sneaked in is the past mon where i gave myself away by carryin my baggg 4 1st parade.. man if i hadn't hav it i would not b suspected.. thank God is the last warnin 4 me or else i dunno wat will happen..

but aniwae.. i hav officially shifted into bravo coy 2dae.. will b sleepin there 2nite already.. well as longgg as i hav a little space of my own i wouldn't mind the environment.. aniwae the great revelation is there is less work in coy line than in the med ctr!! lolzz..




i realized tt my observations abt the companies ar actualli veriii shallow.. while i get 2 noe from my OC tt we could not take off as and when we wanted.. i actualli find tt livin in company line is NOT as strict as in HQ..

becoz in HQ u gotta wake up and 7am so as to prepare 4 1st parade.. after which we hav 2 gather 4 last parade at 1745 b4 we can hav nites out or carry on wif our own stuff.. and i realized tt as the trainin phrase of our battalion progresses.. its verii harddd 2 b stayin in HQ and attached 2 bravo coy 4 tasks and covers and all the stuff..

take 4 example.. yesterdae i had 2 cover 4 range for the company and i onli reached back camp at 2230.. i had no time 4 nites out but tt's not the prob.. the prob is actualli gettin not enuff rest as 1st parade is at 0730 hrs 4 HQ.. (ok i noe u recruits at BMT and trainees at other command schs may find this crap.. but when u ar posted 2 unit u will find this taxin.. realli..)

whereas if im at bravo i could havv a gdddd rest as 1st parade is not realli necessary 4 me.. and last parade aint a strict timin 2 follow too.. i dun mind stayin in camp all dae long.. aniwae can save $$$ wat.. and now the med ctr audit's comin up.. it's super duper xtra taxin 4 the medics there.. once they ar stressed.. i am too.. i dun wish 2 see them suffer.. so i better make myself scarce..

therefore the conclusion: i am ready 2 move into bravo coy.. despite the red beret regular could b a pain the neck at times.. but is these ppl tt i hav 2 live wif and work wif.. by the grace of God hopefully things will change 4 the better.. and rite now he's on leave.. so tt make things temporarily convenient.. lolzz..

bravo bravo!! we love bravo!!

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