Saturday, April 30, 2005
AwKwArD
ok a huge sigh of relief... cg multiplication is nxt mth.. so mean while i can stop thinkin on who will b in the new cg as me..
but 2dae i've seemed 2 gone bonkers again.. i tink not mani noes tt when i go bonkers means i feel insecured inside and jus wantin 2 attract attention.. it succeeds everytime lahz but somehow i gotta find a way out.. mayb the 1st step is 2 stop imagining things as if they ar ard.. i hope tt cures..
but there's a funni feelin when i go cg 2dae.. as i enter the place.. i tot i hav entered into some dream.. immmediately i told myself 2 wake up.. but it did not bring me into my bedroom or a new dimension.. it instead remained as where it is.. then i sense fear cowerin ard me... realizin i was verii awake but my mind was still in a veriii sub-consicous mode.. it took some tme till i started 2 recognize the ppl ard me then i knew where i was..
a great presence of God 2dae at cg.. but the LORD has been tellin me things concernin the future.. but i tink wat i realli need is how do i go thru my situations rite now... mayb im jus too impatient demandin solutions 4 the now.. but i tink the LORD has better plans.. but how i wish i could get over my feelings rite now... now and now..
i knew i could not depend on other ppl all the time 2 get a God answer.. i need 2 hav tt rhema word myself.. so im tryin 2 put a strong front in front of the others but i noe tt would onli last 4 tt long.. i need 2 get the peace of God inside me so tt God can properly establish me accordin 2 His will..
well i guess i would hav 2 strengthen myself once again in the presence of the LORD..
wEiwEi|11:12 PM
